Friday, May 25, 2012

The past 5.5 years, The coming 5.5 years

I haven't got anything in particular in mind to write about today, but due to the weather I'm in really good mood, partly also because there was a significant progress with my dissertation today, after meeting with my supervisor the sixth time! What? yes, the 6th, while in fact people are meant to only have 4.

It's the end of week 6 of Summer term, in 2 weeks I'll be completing all the studies, left with 3 assignments and one research dissertation. Time flies. I've been here for over 5.5 years now. Looking back this year, I came to realize I have become a role model of a few people that I really respect/like, including my high school friends, my previous university friend, my working colleague, and even my viwawa friend! I somehow manage to inspire various people, just because of what I'm doing (I guess). But deep in my heart I know I'm not that good! But if I can motivate people a bit, why not?! Hahaha. I've been procrastinating, been demotivated, been in doubts. I don't know what is in front of me, I don't know if I'm ready to take any challenge I'll be in, yet I'm even worried if there isn't a challenge...

I saw, read, heard various things that changed me. I started to learn what's more important in life and in lives. I also came to understand my life has been easy which I'm very grateful with. I somehow believe in this "quota" theory (my own theory, hahaha) where everything has its limit, so I think I'll have to take up a lot more challenges, be facing a lot more difficulties in my future life (because I'm using too much of the "easy" quota). To make the quota theory more understandable - for example, I also have this "hardworking" quota, from the age of 13 I studied real hard because I thought Hin Hua was a very high standard high school and to make sure I did okay I had to work damn hard. So the next 10 years from my 13 years I worked hard throughout (slightly relaxed in the first and second university years). Now it's more than 10+ years, I came to think the quota is worn off. (Okay it's an excuse of being lazy...) My father suddenly popped into my mind, no, I don't think the hardworking quota is only 10 years, it had to be at least 25-30 years, because I believe that's the time of my dad working real hard. (Oh no HuiBee, you've got no more excuse!!).

Anyway, time is running out, I need a good night sleep, just because the weather has been so good (i.e. warm) - it was too hot for me to go to bed at nights, so I haven't been sleeping well.. And I've got to be working for the next 4 days. Then I'll have a short course on voice analyses and desynthesis - should be a very interesting course! I also applied for a hypnotherapy course in July with peiman. Greeeeedy, everything is an interest!

I'm hoping to travel as much as possible too!!! But couldn't find suitable travel partners.. :( Most new friends are interested to go to places that I had been whereas the old friends.. ughh don't ask me! But now the upmost importance is to complete my assignments, then enjoyyyyyy my dissertation research writing~

(P.S. the title is pure random. It's nothing about the past or future 5.5 years! XD)


FS said...

y u want to "ugh" us? =(

huibee said...

Uggh was an spontaneous connection in that sentence, I didn't ugh you guys lah!

it simply means "many problems that make us not travelling together" and I'm lazy to name them all.. so "ugh" XD

FS said... "ugh" became a word - "I didn't ugh you guys la" xD

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